When life throws you lemons....

So a few weeks ago I found out that the division I work within at the pharmaceutical conglomerate I've been tied to for the last few years is sort of "phasing out". While we've been cautioned to be "responsible" and not tell others that the company is doing away with us entirely, what do you think it REALLY means when they tell you that "no new science is being funded"?? It means with their focus remaining on the commercials side of the business and of those 2 products (we only have 2 mind you) one product is transitioning to Europe and the other is going off patent in 2 years...with no new science, nothing in the pipeline and no portfolio?? YOU'RE DOING AWAY WITH US!!!! lol Love how these higher ups always try to be PC in their delivery lol

So none the less I am faced with an impending lay-off at work. Most likely by March/April 2011. My emotions are running the gamut again. I'm sad, disillusioned, scared, anxious, relieved (? less work right now), happy to have more time on my hands, etc. Poor Cheryll has had to deal with my emotional highs and lows. Now I'm not one who feels that what I do or how I make my living necessarily defines me but I think what has me the most unnerved is the fact that this is my bread & butter. I don't like to every depend on anyone or be a burden/stress to others. I'm very uncomfortable with the fact that I may have to collect unemployment and bring in less $$ to our household, placing stress on Cheryll.

Never mind the fact that I hate having to sell myself! Can't everyone just tell by standing in my presence how awesome and valuable I am to them???  hahaha

Back to the grind of tailoring my resume and putting my "feelers" out there. Uugghhh can't I just sleep through all of this??

This of course is setting us back in the wedding planning department. Now I know we have time, two years out now, and while we like our "date" it's not set in stone until we contract a venue, so all is still very much fluid, I have to admit that my spirits are dampened :-(  I so very much wish to hurl myself into the throws of wedding planning...or wedding saving lol....ahhhhhh such is life...I'm sure my efforts will pick right up after this job situation is dealt with.